Quick update on life

1) First week's been good.

gotta keep up the focus for the days to come.

2) Life sucks for I'm thinking a lot.

Why am I getting so much stress from my family?

I hate stress. They suffocate me.

I freaking hate it.

3) Cut my thick hairdo.

Shouldn't have cut short my fringe. now it needs to grow again -.-

4) Heat trashed the Magic.

Their defense was terrific. ALL OVER THE PLACE.

5) and a new disciplinary rule for myself.

Work > NBA matches.

Any matches I miss I will just watch another time.

work must come before everything.

Alright. Bye people.

Need to freaking work tomorrow.

I want to complain but that's being selfish.

Neither here nor there. Freaking suffocating. see?

One of the photos I found

which I will used for my assignment

At first I wondered if it was a little too feminine of a choice

Then I thought again.

It didn't matter.

What I was attracted to was the feeling expressed from this photo.

Not whether it was the girl or too feminine.

Lucky I didn't miss the whole point.

If not such a nice photo would have been ignored.

Good night.

Just keep moving forward.

There's the only way to find back what you seek.

2 more days till school reopens.

Hopefully it will be a semester

where I can turn everything around.

Nah.

I don't really earn to be anyone famous.

Just simple and meaningful will do.

I do spend some time

just wandering around or near my house

maybe sitting down by the bench

or just taking a stroll at night.

Yeah, it's kinda "emo"

or that I'm thinking a lot.

But seriously.

Sometimes I'm just sitting down

and staring.

Yeah. No thinking.

It's just lazying at a better spot

with better scenery.

Ciao.

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I am turning into a fan of local artistes.
Joi Tsai (Cai Chun Jia)
Wu Jia Hui
Serene Koong
etc etc

Currently I am listening to Stefanie Sun.

I'm a sensitive being so somehow my emotions rules over my logic
It's a feeling hard to express
It's just that when I listen to their songs
I feel... warm and just this feelings that draws me to wanna listen over and over again.
Maybe there's a local flavor in their songs.
I don't know.
I can't explain.
It's a feelings kind of thing.
But whatever it is, their songs are a few of my faves.

So...
Life.

Everyday I seem to observe a little something.
Well... 18 years.
Acutally it's still young
and you still have to learn.

I think a lot and i bet many people knows about that.
At the same time, I tend to put a lot of faults on myself.
which leads to stress and many other problems.

So when I make a mistake
I can go over and over them again.
After 18 years, maybe I am still the same.
But I do realized the need to think lesser.

When I do make mistakes.
Then I will just tell myself.
"It happened."
I tell myself, it's probably meant this way.

Maybe I am a believer of fate
or I am starting to believe it more.
Because thinking back can't do much, moving on and you never know what's gonna happen.

Might as well tell yourself.
when something happened, it just did so.
Whether it's good or bad, it's meant to be.
But carry the mentality that at least you tried.

When you try hard and it doesn't happen.
It's just didn't because it wasn't meant to be.
When you try hard and it does happen.
It just did because it was meant to be but at the same time
because you made it happened.

There, a little consolation.
Life is harsh. but when you be optimistic, it doesn't kill you one bit.
No one bit, maybe you look foolish to others
but at the end of the day, you did yourself a favor
you appreciated life when they probably didn't.

I'm supposed to be awake
in 4 hrs. gosh i better sleep now.

To Os people, good luck for yr exams.
Make yourselves proud.
whatever happens happens
Just make sure at least you tried.

I bet nobody knows

I take at least 1 hr before I fall asleep.

Yeah crazy huh

I would be listening to my music player

and letting my imaginations run wild

also constantly thinking about the past, present and future.

Well

It definitely came across my mind

that I think too much

Then again

when I don't think

It feels weird and it never happens

So the solution is just to put the thinking

at the right time

That applies to life.

It's about balancing.

Doing the right things at the right time.

I guess I do analyse myself a lot.

Like I'm more of an introvert actually.

To me

I guess I enjoy myself more through all these

emotional types of satisfaction.

Extroverts probably get their enjoyment

through activities and going out pretty often

They are social people.

They are those that live for the day and

the things they do are the ones that bring them their fun and happiness

For me personally

I guess I get my sense of satisfaction by letting

my imagination run wild.

It's kinda unrealistic actually

Like most of the time, we make up for what we can't enjoy in other ways

For this case

We replace all the social activities

simply by thinking and imagining.

Kinda creepy but whatever

That's me alright.

Alright

I'm just bored so I'm blogging.

School's starting soon.

Yup.

Buckle up and time for another ride soon.

It's been days since I last blogged.

So here I am.

Gonna make this a long post though.

It's pretty much a self-reflection period.

At the same time I will share some amazing
pictures I got from Bing.
:)

So holidays are here.
What have I been up to?

Just going out once in a while
playing games mostly
and
I've been practicing my guitar skills
Well, just learning for leisure that's all.

1st half of Year 2 had been a pretty amazing journey.
Even in just that short few month period

My friends had changed me in some ways.
I am more open and crazy in some sense.
Also, all the fun seemed to have taken a whole lot
of my thinking away
(Except when I'm designing and that kinda ruined my project..)

Anyway knowing myself
I know I can't get away without thinking.
But P2 was a real wake up call for me.

P2 was the moment
that made me felt so disappointed.
I had never had that much regret in my life
(Breakup was the most but that's all in the past)

I was really affected.
For a few days I couldn't bring myself together.
I know that I was really disappointed in myself.

It made me realized
how much my lack of self-confidence had killed me.
I needed to make a change.
Something which I knew I had to
but I was always finding excuses to avoid.

I always had the play-safe mentality.
I thought it could always guarantee me
100% genuine responses.
But life doesn't go that way.
I needed to realize that and P2 made it happened.

My past lecturers for projects had told me
I could design.
I always took that compliment but never 100%.

It is really time to make a change.
I have to have a sense of confidence in me.

When you don't
people who expected much of you gets disappointed.
You feel disappointed in yourself as well.
I think those doesn't matter as much as
the possibility of something good happening.

It just isn't fair.
It isn't fair to anyone and most of all yourself.

Jump into the pool and see what happens.
It is time for me to be more daring.
I need to raise my level of expectations.

That will be the focus I shall take
when school term begins again.
Be daring
Be confident
Be a willing learner
and never back down from problems.

So this shall be my first expectation from myself.
Make the change. Expect myself to do it.

I've been lazying at home
the past days just playing guitar and games.
From tomorrow onwards
I need to change.

Can't waste my entire holidays.
One change in me is that I don't play ball that much anymore
BUT
I'm still a hardcore NBA fan.

So I shall limit the amount of time I spend on games.
and take a few hours each day to enhance my design skills.
I need to gain that momentum and
continue that into the new school term.

I realized I strayed away from my goal a bit
How I loved the nature and wished to travel to places
when I get older.

Looking at all these amazing nature photos
is overwhelming.
It just makes me more excited and wanting to get out
there to look at mother nature more closely.

I shall continue to remind myself
that this will be part of my goals.

Growing up and now that I'm 18
I realized a lot of problems surface

They kind of take away your motivation
and aspirations.

How do I put it...
Many of these issues are like

The society is going to be harsh..
Am I going to get a good job?
I need to be more serious in my work
etc..

All those issues.
I mean they kinda blind you away
They make you forget what your goals and motivation are.

Then you become lost.

We often watch inspiring films
that's the case for me of course.
and we get touched by how one person
can carry on with life against all his obstacles
despite all the doubts and disbelief
and pull through to succeed and inspire others.

Sounds amazing.

But the moment we individuals step into our own lives.
That perspective is gone.
We let our fears blind us again.
I have that mindset.
But I need to change.

It's not about being unrealistic
but instead
giving your best at something
because you will never know until you try.
When you fail, you fail
but at least you tried.

So again,
I shall take a new approach
and take that into the new school term.



These amazing animals.
I like to watch wildlife films
but haven't been watching in months.

I am more of a loner type
not entirely anti-social or can't communicate
I just sometimes
prefer to hang out on my own and watch these inspiring films etc.

It gives me my time to think and
reflect on life.
It also makes me appreciate things much better.

Again I hope all these inspiring photos
will be my source of motivation.

To remind myself constantly
that I need to work hard (Which I haven't)
and that someday I will be the one at these places.

So now I'm going to rest already.
Need to wake up early

My highly-anticipated Heat Training Camp will be
showing later on around 6-7 am on NBA

So I can't miss it.

Miami Heat's been amazing because
of what they pull through.
Now they've got a fantastic team
and their goal will be winning the championship.

Honestly
I feel special to be their fan.
Because I didn't become a Heat fan only after they acquire LeBron and Bosh
I was already a fan of Miami despite their mediocre 2 seasons
I've been behind the team even though they weren't the best.

Because of people like Dwyane Wade and Alonzo Mourning
seeing the things they do on court
the passion they have
they make me love basketball even more

Now that they put together one of the best teams ever
it makes me feel special to be a fan of theirs.

I look forward the the season they have
and hopefully they prove the doubters wrong
and win the championship.

I sound like a crazy fellow now but hey
I am proud to be one.
:)

Alright I need to take my rest
Training camp to watch
Probably a trip to the library
and dinner at night with Fendy and Jin Yi

A new approach to life
taking the small steps to success
I will work my ass off for my future projects
I will.
I demand myself to do so.

One day I will be there.
This shall be my motivation.

Good night people.