No matter what happens. Just don't give up.

Well. I have a rather...

weird and far far ahead topic here today.

See the pics?

Yeah, parenting.

Well, I was on my way to get my lunch

below my block.

Then I saw this parents holding on to their little boy

each one holding on to one of his small little palm.

Telling the child in such a sweet tone in Chinese, "Slowly walk, be careful."

For a moment there, I really thought that that was sweet.

I won't deny, I've had thoughts myself.

How would it feels like to be a parent?

I have to say, when I thought about that

I told myself it's going to be one hell of a task

because it's never easy to teach a child

especially in the modern society.

I've shared views with my friends

how we would want to teach our kids.

I told them that I wouldn't want to be rich.

I want my kid to live in a standard family that he or she

could learn what it meant to be content with things.

But of course, I've had thoughts of how that could backfire.

I mean as a parent you want your child to live a good life right?

What I'm doing is kind of the exact opposite isn't it?

So.. that's when I realized the difficulty of raising a child.

Speaking of that... I have to go back to that

same old topic I've emphasized on so much.

The society nowadays seem to move too fast ahead.

We don't realized what's happening to the future.

Honestly speaking...

Tell me what you see happening to kids nowadays.

I see so many of us getting stressed up.

Some are exposed to things earlier than expected.

Some are forced to do things that they shouldn't be doing

at a young age.

I guess we have to blame everyone

but at the same time, no one.

Contradicting but yes.

We can only look to change things.

Blaming everyone else will not change anything.

It's hard being a parent.

I thank my parents for raising me up to who I am now.

I feel fortunate and the adrenaline rush

to be out there in the future, doing my best to help people.

I also came to realize another thing

Parents very often want the best for their kids

But sometimes backfires and forces their children into a state of turmoil.

I guess what is the best

is not to choose the path or order them to take the right paths you see for them.

Because that suffocates them with the lack of freedom.

Instead, at times just to give them advices

and let their children choose what they want.

Unless it's really an extreme mistake not to be made,

kids more or less should have their freedom.

Of course, parents will worry a hell lot if their children chose the wrong path.

But life's never easy, not even for your kids.

But eventually if you can be there for them

when they need you the most

Most of all your actions means a lot to them
Being the best role model is the most important.

Of course I can't back up what I say

I'm just saying my thoughts.

I am not a parent and I'm far from becoming one.

Just my thoughts.

So. Please forgive me for any mistakes :]

A second life when you become a parent.
Hmmm.

I realized I have become more open-minded.

Maybe somehow... I've grown even more.

A friend of mine, older than I am,

said that I am still ignorant of certain things

maybe the ugly side of people and the society.

At first thought, I totally disagree.

If you read my blog, you will realize

how much I think.

Maybe I'm not mature but that doesn't mean I don't know about realities.

Yeah I have to admit, I was pretty offended.

But then I decided it wasn't important at all.

Maybe being ignorant is good.

Most of all, I just want to be optimistic.

Because I believe positive thinking brings positive outcome.

Not just myself but also to everyone else.

So excited for tomorrow. Many people coming down
and also I'm gonna try a few new things for myself.
Hell yeah I love the weekends :D

Also, the playoffs have suddenly become interesting.
Lakers and Suns in tight competition.
Magic all of a sudden in the brink of making history
coming back from a 0-3 deficit to beat the Celtics.
It's another "win or go home" situation tomorrow.

HELL YEAH!

I've never mentioned how much I love basketball.
Because I feel that I can't do that.
I feel that I don't have the right to say that
but in my heart I just know that this game
has become a part of me.
Whatever it is, I am so glad
that I picked up this sports.
Because it's taught me so many things
not just making me tougher but also maturing.

For today

Just for today

I wanna be proud of myself

For becoming who I am now

Just for today... Yong Xi

Everyday you look back.

You realized how stupid you were the day before.

So true... Haha :D

guess that's growing up huh?

I need to be a less serious person.

I'm far too serious about things.

hmmmm...

Anyway, yesterday was pretty shiok.

5 hours straight at the basketball court.

Everything was fine... until this... short stout came and play with us.

I have to admit, he's pretty agile.

But he's got a mouth that spoils his whole image.

Totally ruined my mood last night.

Just came in with his big-headed-ness (new word)

and lots of rubbish coming out from that mouth of his.

But lucky for him the rest of us just played along with him.

Only Shaun and I had that "Buay-Song" look on the face all night.

-.-"

So today is Sunday.

Gonna slack and then do my research later.

probably watch some movies if I have the time.

Maybe there just need to be someone
to constantly remind me how fun life can be.
Because all 18 years of my life I've been so hard on myself.

I expect the best out of myself because
unlike so many unfortunate people out there
who may be born with illnesses or disabilities
I am born with the perfect health.

If I don't live and do things to my fullest
I feel like I'm being so bad to them.
And that every single opportunity I let go
could have made a difference for someone.

I am the type of person who needs motivation.
Once I have a goal in mind,
I can get myself to go all out.
But I guess I have to wait.
Maybe that someone to push me
or something to motivate me just isn't here yet.

Yong Xi.
Learn to relax.

Learn.

Wonder why I am so annoying all the times
by telling myself this and that.
all sorts of weird and deep things.

I take a lot of pride in learning to be good.
How I grew up is a huge part of that.
How I saw things and realized what it meant to feel fortunate.

I look up to a lot of basketball players as role models.

Especially Michael Jordan and Dwyane Wade.
Both are actually underrated players when they first entered the league.

MJ came in as the 17th pick and suddenly shined with his
soaring and athletic capabilities.
Then he brought 6 championships to the Bulls.
Jordan, however, only got his first ring in his 8th season.
But after which he won the championship 3 consecutive times.
Left NBA for a year, came back and won another 3 rings consecutively.
He overcame many issues to showed the world
he has what it takes to be the best.
He took competition with pride and would
rise up to any challenge.

Dwyane Wade was predicted to stay between 8-10 pick.
Then Miami shocked the draft by picking him as the 5th pick.
Then guess what happened
He out-shined LeBron and Carmelo and brought the Heat a championship
in only his 3rd season.
Then after which, injuries bugged him and the Heat fell.
But he worked hard because there were many doubts about him.
In the Summer Olympics 2008, he led Team USA in scoring
as they won the gold medal, undefeated.
He came back in the 2008-2009 season winning the NBA scoring title
as he single-handedly brought the Heat back to the playoffs again.
He overcame injuries and use people's doubt as a
source of his motivation to work harder.

These things are not only applied in basketball.
They apply in life too.
So that's what I want to learn from them.
To overcome obstacles
and be a stronger person.

萧敬腾 - 疼爱

我沈默不代表我不痛
我不痛眼泪就不会流
总是安静承受安静忍受
安静看你走

你说我很适合当朋友
你说我总是会听你说
你说别太难过保持联络
有空的时候

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
最痛是当时微笑送你走
等到你转身后眼泪也不敢流
只怕你偶然还会回过头

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
放开手是我最后的温柔
如果你能飞得快乐自由
这疼痛并不算什麽

想挽留却为什麽点头
我不懂连我都不懂我
如果说的太少爱的太多
有谁能够懂

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
最痛是当时微笑送你走
等到你转身后眼泪也不敢流
只怕你偶然还会回过头

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
放开手是我最后的温柔
如果你能飞得快乐自由
这疼痛并不算什麽

千言万语拥挤我的宇宙
让我震耳欲聋喔喔
有多少爱就有多少
沈默的疼痛

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
最痛是当时微笑送你走
等到你转身后眼泪也不敢流
只怕你偶然还会回过头

把疼爱都给你把疼痛都给我
放开手是我最后的温柔
如果你能飞得快乐自由
这疼痛并不算什麽

如果超人会飞那就让我在空中停一停歇

再次俯瞰这个世界会让我觉得好一些

拯救地球好累虽然有些疲惫但我还是会

不要问我哭过了没因为超人不能流眼泪

Don't be stupid.

Looking back doesn't change things.

Time doesn't wait for you.

You have to make the change for the future.

I really wished those words could slap me right in my face.

What do I want from the past?

I want myself back.

Yes I know I can't turn back time.

But I wished I could change back to my old self.

I know maybe I just demand too much from myself sometimes.

When I do well, I think i can do much, much better.

When I am really disastrous, I totally demoralize myself.

Maybe I just can't accept failures?

Sometimes I feel so fake.

Like I do something just for the sake of it.

I cheat others and I cheat myself.

I just feel like I am a liar, maybe even a two-faced bloody asshole.

I was quiet.

I was calm and approachable.

I could keep secrets.

I was humble and just a hard-worker.

Whenever I looked back, I could feel so much respect for who I used to be.

Now?

I may be more outgoing, but somehow, I changed.

I don't know how. I don't know what.

I just feel it.

I just want to change back to who I used to be.

But I don't know how.

I may be a boring person but honestly I don't care.

Because I won't cheat you and I won't cheat myself.

I like to accept facts, whether they hurt or not.

Because I don't want to lie to myself.

If I do, I will never learn from mistakes.

I understand that people are different and sometimes

you have to change to adapt.

I know that and I can see situations before I change.

Maybe I'm just stubborn

sometimes I don't see the need to change.

Sometimes, others may not like that.

I always remind myself, just enough is good enough.

I know how arrogant and big-headed I can get.

I want to be a nobody

so that I can always look up to somebody and remind myself

I must never stop working hard.

I always feel the need to help someone who needs help.

Because sometimes people can't help themselves.

Sometimes they need to be guided before they can fly.

Sometimes I see people I know.

But I don't know how to say hi.

So I start feeling bad about it.

So fake of myself.

Well?

So much thoughts on my mind.

But I don't know where to start changing.

Maybe I just need to get rid of my fears.

I fear too much.

Far too much.

Gimme a goddamn plastic bag

let me cover over my head

with a smiley face

Why are there so many things on my mind now?
Frustrating shit.

No i'm not going to swear.

I already promised myself.

Screw all these rubbish on my mind.

Relaxing Sunday in front of my computer..

So before I pass the computer to my bro

I wanna do a post.

Tomorrow's plan is to go to school early

and sit in the library for 3 hours

and watch "Hoop Dreams" since I've got nothing much to do.

It's due tomorrow anyway.

Once again. Block 2 will be

3-9 pm session.

Another night life to start again

._. oh well..

As I've mentioned earlier

a few of my classmates helped me.

The things they did reminded me of what I planned.

What I wanted to achieve.

So I hope tomorrow will be another different start.

Of course I can't expect what to happen.

But I just hope that the positive mindset

stays with me.

This is what I see.

As the years pass, the new generations are definitely more talented

and smarter. But we failed to realize that along with that,

the stress are actually making them more brittle, more emotionally.

Yes, I have to agree.

We are not as mentally tough as people in the past.

We break down easily despite how capable we may be.

Sometimes adults may not understand us

and think that we don't understand things.

But actually we do. We may know even more than they do.

But it's not every time that that's the case.

Last but not least,
I just wanna say that these are just my views.
I like to share my thoughts on the blog.
But please if you have a different view, by all means.
So if there's any offensive things, please forgive.
They are unintentional :]

I like to look back at things. I can't helped it.
Sometimes I will wonder if doing that bothers the people
that shared a part in my past.
Because it may be something they don't wanna recall.

But I can reassure
after so much of a roller coaster ride,
I will only look back to learn from them and appreciate the happy ones.

I've never told anyone before.
I'm afraid of loving another person wholeheartedly.
I know myself, if I really love someone
I will put in everything.

It's not the fear of getting hurt. We all get hurt at some point in life.
It's the fear of hurting people.
I know myself well enough. I don't wanna hurt anyone else.
So for now, I want this thing call "love" to stay out of my life.

Only when the time is right, I will start considering it again.
But for now, I know there are better things awaiting.
Life lessons to make me grow up even more.

Alright.
Off to eat and read Chicken Soup.
Ciao!

Finally Weekends!

Time for a long post and reflection.

Over the past weeks

I've seen yet many examples of how complicated

the human relationship can get, even from myself.

As much as I personally hate it

it is a fact we have got to live with.

That's why there are socializing classes etc, etc,

for people like me who can't seem to socialize well.

There will be likes and dislikes every time

We can't change and avoid that.

But we can always decide how we can deal with them.

It's all about decisions, many things are.

For myself, maybe I am arrogant at times that I may not realized.

Because I don't like to have disputes with people.

At times if people say I'm at fault for something

I may not take it very well because

I've been living all my life with the mindset that

if any fights happen, it's never my fault.

Because I have never been the one to start a fight.

Get what I mean?

Very often, many of us do things unconsciously.

Unconscious for so long, certain things become a habit.

The past month has been devastating for me.

I've been plagued with the lack of motivation.

I've never reached that stage before, never that frustrating.

I was lost.

I felt that I've chosen the wrong path and now

it just seems hard to reverse anything.

Then, after looking at everything and thinking.

I realized it eventually led to good things.

I was on the verge of giving up.

Not handing up a 20% assignment at all.

Because I was deprived of sleep.

Because I had to put double hours to redo the files I lost

after a unfortunate incident.

Because I had many things left undone.

Then things took a turn.

Normally, its best to motivate and say don't give up.

My friends didn't do that.

There was no words but only actions.

Thanks to them, they pulled me back to the person I used to be

The optimistic hard-worker I used to be.

It was then I realized

For so long, I have been relying on myself so much

I forgot what it meant to ask for help when in need.

They made me realized that.

It was all thanks to them :)

I handed up my work on time

and Italian went smoothly.

I also know what I want next.

Creative Writing and Psychology.

Guess it's about time I remind myself
of my goal.

Last but not least.
Despite all the attention on the Final 4 teams in the playoffs
I'm also excited about the Miami Heat.
Next season will be one to look out for.
Because I'm starting to see what they meant by
Miami being the most attractiv0 location to free agents.

Raja Bell, excellent 3pt-shooter and defender
has made himself available to Miami Heat.

Joe Johnson, the face of the Atlanta Hawks, has made it
clear that he don't mind being 2nd or 3rd option
as long as he's on a winning team.

Heat fans have been doing EVERYTHING they can to keep Wade.
First it was signing the petition to ask Wade to stay.
Then it was the opening of the web
- www.wewantwade.com -

With all these excitement
I really don't know what to expect next.

We will definitely keep Wade if Riley makes the right moves.
But this time it's for a championship team
that last at least a decade.

Let's just wait and see.
Meanwhile we can enjoy the playoffs
:D

Let the games begin!!

Life's like a jigsaw puzzle
You go through tough times to get the right pieces together
But at the end of it
You get satisfaction beyond imagination.

Today's gonna be another awesome day :D

First of all,

Thanks to all those who wished me happy birthday.

Really appreciate it.

Thank you all :)

I hope I can hand up entech on time

and to finish up the italian role play in success.

Lastly,

I hope that I can get my good night's rest by the end of the day.

and enjoy my weekends

before another double block begins.

Thanks again to the people who wished me.

I'm officially an adult I guess?

Growing up is a tough thing.

But one without challenges wont make a person grow up.

So yeah.

I'm really worn out... so

Bye and best of luck to me.

I Just woke up.

So I'm going to do my assignment now...

But at the same time

I just wanna take out some time to blog.

I finally got to see my neighbor's dog.

It wasn't a bulldog like my mom told me -.- (Completely wrong!)

Though I don't know the breed,

It was still a really adorable dog.

I just fell in love with it at first sight.

Every second I had I just went up to touch it.

And it would always lick my hands.

But I guess the thing I didn't like was that it had to sleep in a cage...

I know I'm being over-emotional about this..

but... I just can't help but notice that sad look on the face.

It just had a frowning face to it.

Maybe that was its usual face? I don't know.

But seeing that face always reminds me about

the animals in captivity

and how they really don't deserve it...

Maybe it just hasn't completely sink in with the family yet.

It's still been less than a month after all...

That really gave me the thought

that I wanted a dog for myself.

But of course

My house ain't big enough...

My family can't afford it...

I have no time for one...

When you really want a pet, especially one like a dog.

Make sure you have to be dedicated.

Yeah, maybe I will consider that in the future?

When I grow up and start working?

You never know in life

especially a stressful one,

A dog can teach you lessons about life.

Okay. That's about it.

Bye People!

"My father didn't tell me how to live,
He lived and let me watch him do it."
- Clarence B. Kelland

I don't need myself to be the most outstanding one
Although I know in my heart, I'm a person who loves attention.
I will rather work behind the stage
and that I will always want time off for myself.
Time to spend on my own and reflect about everyday lives.

I'm a hard-worker when I'm motivated.
If ever anyone comes up to me and tell me I worked too hard.
I would smile and tell them,
"This is my way of telling myself nothing comes easy.
Being humble is atop everything."

I hate it when my mom starts nagging.

I can understand that she's tired from work.

But I'm also tired from a whole day at school.

To come home and get nagged at is obviously

the least I would really want.

Then of course, I kept quiet.

Best to avoid a conflict.

Growing up is a complicated thing.

But I think I'm on the right track.

Best of all is that I'm enjoying things I do and the people I hang out with.

Remember about me saying wanting to go to uni?

I am thinking maybe I should drop that idea.

Because I'm tired. I don't think I will ever catch up.

The standard set is just rising.

I mean... You just get so easily disheartened.

At times you wanna blame them for doing so much extra work,

making others' work look so lousy.

But the truth is that you can't.

Because it's your fault that you didn't put in that extra effort.

It's frustrating. It really is.

Why is the world so complicated?
Why is everyone so eager to survive?
Why? Why? Why?
We just keep moving forward and never seemed to realize
we may be killing ourselves at the end of all these.

I know I have some writer genes in me.

But I only have the ideas and not the language.

Chicken Soup for the Soul

Bet you know this book.

I read it just now and I have to admit,

It totally changed my perspectives of things with just two chapters.

Of course, I've never been a bookworm.

This volume of CS is subtitled, "Inside Basketball"

Now you understand how I managed to get myself to even read.

Back to the topic.
With stories from athletes, coaches and writers,

The short stories really inspired me, even though I only read through 2 chapters.

This book has made me believed that hard work and passion really do exist.

I've always been known as a hard worker, and not a smart one.

I believed basketball has shaped me to become an even harder worker.

Maybe I'm a little too old-fashioned,

but I still believe strongly in that.

Hard work pays, it really does.

These athletes we've seen on TV.

They are all hard workers, they work their asses off in the gym.

Wanting to play the game they love at their very best.

As critics and fans, we can easily criticize their performances

but we can never criticize the amount of hard work they put in.

The one thing many of us need is a motivation.

But it may take ages or even forever to find them.

But once you find them, don't let go.

You will then realize how important they may be.

I will continue to read this book and finish it.

Because it had changed my perspectives of things in a huge way.

That I want myself to calm down and not let anger get the worst out of me.

Everyone's born to be different
that's something I can't change.
But I can always change myself
and contribute to the society.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the mastery of it."

- Fred Allen

Sometimes I appreciate the fact that I was never anyone special.
Because somehow in that way, I realized what it meant to be humble.

Last but not least, to my mom.
Happy Mother's Day :]

What make others so much a happier person than me?

I guess the answer for me is easy.

They choose to see the happy things and block out the unnecessary.

So... that basically means that

I'm an idiot to be such an emo kid?

I can't seem to avoid the unnecessary

because I always feel that if I don't bother

who else will?

It's like a huge pressure to be as though

you're putting the whole world's problems on your own.

Then someone else comes along

tap you and tell you in your face

"Why are you bothering so much? Someone else will handle this, so go out there

and have fun!"

So... basically answer me this question.

Has anyone EVER answered the call?

Why is it that the answer can't be this

"Hey dude, you can't handle this alone. I'm gonna stand by you. Let's do it together."

Now you see why I always can't get myself

to have that BS 'bo chap' attitude.

It's like a flu.

When one person doesn't bother, the rest follow

they may always reply 'someone else will handle this'

I mean... isn't this the same

as how we always give a similar excuse to say that

eventually things will be done.

Right.

Most of the time, they don't.

Oh well.

I will continue to live a optimistic life

and continue to find a way out of things.

I will. I am not that weak.

I wished at times

I was born as a Black

That way I could play basketball for life

Living in the streets and a poor life

may be tough

but they make you understand and appreciate things better.

ps. At times I also wished I could soar.

That I could fly and just act freely.

Long hours at school are just killing me.

From 10/11am all the way till 9pm.

Entirely at school.

Happened that I just dozed off for Italian class yesterday.

Damn...

Assignments are also just piling up.

3 assignments at hand now.

2 of them are group assignments.

Means long weekends of work.

Hopefully I can still fork out time

to play some basketball.

That's probably the best leisure for me.

The one where I can enjoy myself to the max.

Was thinking that if I can go off by 6+ today

Maybe I can drop by 108 to basketball till 10.

Oh well

assignments to set to first priority for now.

Magic looks the strongest currently.
So I'm rooting for them.
Besides, Howard is my other fave player :D

If magic does not win this year, it's fine.
They are still a young yet solid team.

However it's a do or never for Suns and Cavs.
Both LeBron and Stoudamire will be free agents next season.
So both teams will be looking to build up their teams
once playoffs are done and over with.

Lakers will be able to contend for a year more years...
at least.
Gasol and kobe ain't getting any younger.

Let's just see how things go.