Originally,
I wanted to go emo

I mean just reflecting on my thoughts.
I have really never felt this troubled before in my life.

But I think its time to move ahead and get on with life.

For these past few days I've been restless
just unmotivated, slacking at home.

I've been troubled as a teen trying to clear some
family issues off my head.
I think I still have a sense of responsibility
and
it isn't right for me to argue about it.
So I will need to learn to approach it in a better way.

You know
for the past 17 years, I've always been wondering and been aware of many things.
A friend of mine commented that
sometimes I am ignorant to friends' feelings

Honestly when I heard that I was kind of dumbfounded
because all the way I've always thought of myself
as the kind of person who put everyone else before me.

Before I even make a decision
I would try to make sure no one gets left behind.

But it turns out that it was all because I was fearful
I was fearful of the consequences

Hmmmm... still...
I kind of disagree to that statement somehow :/

As much as I know myself
If ever i fail to help a troubled friend
I will start thinking a lot and get emotional over it
But I think its time to stop that

if ever I'm needed
that person can approach me
I dont have to dwell over it
and start treating it as my own problem.

I need to stand on my own before people can even depend on me.

Okay
That's all
Im trying to get my life in order now
Holidays ending soon

See ya